ASK ELLIE: Wedding Expenses and Future Bridezilla
I’m planning a wedding in May 2022 and the expenses far exceed my expectations. Of course I want it all, the big dress, the amazing photographer, the full sit-down dinner, the venue, the honeymoon, etc. My parents made it clear what my budget is and that I have to match every dollar, and they are not paying for my honeymoon at all. Is it wrong to charge wedding guests for catering and bar. I think that would be a great idea, so I get what I need that day, and my guest gets a great dinner.
Dear Murfreesboro Bride:
Your parents gave you a budget, stick to it and pay your share. In fact, I think you should pay for all of this because your parents don’t have to throw a party for you.
NO, NO, NO, it is not appropriate to charge guests to attend your wedding. You might find that you won’t have any guests. You call your guests real guests and that’s a good thing. You don’t charge the guests, they’re guests.
You don’t mention the groom at all, what does he think? Does the groom participate in this event.
If you are really interested in saving money on a wedding, here are some thoughts. Ask yourself what is most important to you and your spouse. Is it the destination, location, invitations, flowers, cake, food, open bar, photography, etc. Find that thing that is most important and stick to it, then build your wedding and party around it.
I would recommend never to compromise on two things: the photographer and the vows. This day cannot be over, so it’s important to document it the first and only time it happens. For your wishes, I suggest that you write your own and that they come from the heart. This is your declaration of love for each other. Everything else is a compromise.
You will be wearing your dress for less than half a day. Then you can box it and keep it at the top of your closet for what? Rent a dress. You can get a much better dress by renting one rather than buying it.
When you buy your wedding cake, don’t go to all the tastings, it adds costs. We all know what the cake looks like. Also, go to a bakery and order cakes separately and bake them yourself. If you do a little research on how to do it, it will save you a lot of money. Calling a cake a wedding cake only adds cost. Recently I bought a three tier cake at Sam’s Wholesale club for a party, it was $ 68 and was three flavors, and delicious. It’s a piece of cake. it shouldn’t cost a fortune.
For bridesmaid dresses and groomsmen clothes, these are your friends, be nice to them. Make sure the girls like the dresses and can wear them again. For men, make sure they’re not wearing an ill-fitting rental tuxedo, or better yet, opt for a nice suit that they can put back on. JCPennys has great online prices for dresses, and you can return sizes that don’t fit you easily.
Do NOT tell your bridesmaids that they need to lose weight or wear their hair a certain way. Unless you are paying for hair and makeup these are your friends, let them love you.
For flowers, Sam’s Wholesale Club has the best wedding flowers made to order. I have used them on several occasions and have never been disappointed. Or if you want a girls night before your wedding, Nashville Flower Market sells flowers in bulk for a fraction of the price and you can make your own arrangements.
For music, do you want people to dance at your party? Then hire a DJ on a band or have someone make you a USB stick for mixtape or a Spotify playlist.
For the invitations, you can make your own, it’s personal and beautiful. Canva is an easy-to-use source for graphic design. If you use a designer and a printer, evaluate them. You’ll pay what you want for the invitations, so check out plenty of places.
For food, if you want a full party, then you need food. If you want a short reception, then cake, water, coffee and punch. It is entirely up to you. To get it treated, call a restaurant with a food truck. Your food will be fresher with a food truck they bring the restaurant to your party. They can also chat with you about paper or glass, tablecloths and other food necessities.
For your venue, if you are not going to drink alcohol at your wedding, have you considered a community park for an outdoor wedding. The city or county would like to rent you a parking space for your day, and the price is pennies, and sometimes free. People can spread out and have a picnic vibe. If you want a large, luxury home, be prepared to pay for the luxury and save on the expense.
Destination weddings demand a lot from guests, so be prepared for many absent.
Sign up for freebies because people will want to buy you a freebie. DO NOT SIGN UP for CASH – it’s rude. Don’t sign up for people to pay for your honeymoon, that’s RUDE too. The great thing is signing up for a charity, and asking your guests to donate to charity rather than a giftAnd if you create a GoFundMe account for your wedding or request Venmo donations , please … you are lacking in maturity to get married, the world does not revolve around you, not even on your wedding day. However, signing up for a $ 1,500 lawn mower makes sense if you have a home, and many friends can contribute to the giveaway, or guests can purchase gift cards.
Wedding Parties and Groom Parties – YES, you must attend these parties. Mom doesn’t have a party in a state and the bride is too busy to attend. The rudeness in this area is far beyond comprehension.
Pay your installments. If you don’t pay your deposit, you won’t get the photographer, catering, and other things you ordered. You must pay all invoices before the event and on time.
Try to relax, even if it’s a special day, it’s a day out of the rest of your life together. Things will go wrong, try to deal with it. You dress nicely, and are with your family and friends, why are you stressed? Be a beautiful bride and a lovely hostess, not a bridezilla.
Your loved ones will want to celebrate you, but just keep in mind that people have their celebratory limits that they can handle. Be kind.
Good luck with the planning,